Remember
that other people may be totally wrong.
But they don’t think so. Don’t
condemn them. Any fool can do that. Try to understand them. Only wise, tolerant,
exceptional people even try to do that.
There
is a reason why the other man thinks and acts as he does. Ferret out that reason --- and you have the
key to his actions, perhaps to his personality.
Try
honestly to put yourself in his place.
If you
say to yourself, “How would I feel, how would I react if I were in his shoes?" you will save yourself time and irritation,
for “by becoming interested in the cause, we are less likely to dislike the
effect." And, in addition, you will
sharply increase your skill in human relationships.
In his book Getting Through to
People, Dr. Gerald S. Nirenberg commented: “ Cooperativeness in conversation is
achieved when you show that you consider the other person’s ideas and feelings
as important as your own. Starting your
conversation by giving the other person the purpose or direction of your
conversation, governing what you say by what you would want to hear if you were
the listener, and accepting his or her viewpoint will encourage the listener to
have an open mind to your ideas."
