Aimer - Words

 "I love you" is such a powerless word

Even now, I don't need anything but you

The image of you I hold inside, please don't become a liar

I can't cling (抓緊) onto the you I once knew anymore

Tell me "I won't leave you alone anymore"

while holding me so tightly with you arm

but now you're nowhere to be found

I want you to feel the scars you left in my heart

but you weren't able to find them

If we can't meet anymore

then I at least wanted to have the chance hate you

I don't even know anyone with such a gentle smile but you

I wanted to become strong so I wouldn't be afraid of trusting others

I didn't want to hurt you in my state of desperation of anxiety

I loved you so much, the one who lives like the seasons

that I forget to even breath

The happiness I found slips off my hand without a sound to be made

"I love you" is such a powerless word

Even now I don't need anything but you

There was no "goodbye", you just vanished without saying a word

After trying to satisfy you so much

you didn't even give me one last word

"I love you" is such a powerless word

Even now, I can't start walking alone from here

I'm wishing tomorrow wouldn't be able to be seen in the sky as dawn breaks

I'll say these last words "goodbye, dear"

So I can go forward again

放下了

仇恨只會滋長更多的仇恨，我要懂得放下，以平常心處理問題。當事人到這一刻仍舊覺得自己沒有做錯，做錯的只是挑起事端的人。其實，當事人才是始作俑者。至於為什麼會波及其他人，自己仍是百思不得其解。下這個決定時，自己也想了半晚，撫心自問，人誰無錯，但當事人犯下的錯比自己曾經犯的錯嚴重得多。很多事情也不想公開，以免引起更多的誤會。此事只是向一位朋友傾訴一番，他說得對，我只是做了一項正確的事。想多一點，我之前將積怨、仇恨牽涉在內，可能這就是自己唯一的錯。

Bauhaus

HK Zoological and Botanical Gardens

師之惰

又不是什麼詩詞歌賦

一味只是叫學生背背背

當學生是填鴨、海綿

不講求思考、分析

背不到便責罵、懲罰

簡直是童年陰影

珍惜光陰

我們應該做一點怡情養性的清閒消遣，例如種植一些花草瓜果。因為草木的枯榮，與瓜果的收穫，對於人生似乎有著一種天然的啟示，春盡花落，我們不可把光陰虛擲，尤其在非常時期中，我們應該自我覺醒。

改編自葉靈鳳的文字

The Catcher in the Rye Ch.4

chew the rag: to discuss, chat, converse, etc., especially at length and in a leisurely, friendly manner

washbowl: a large bowl for water that is used to wash one's hands and face

pierce: to enter or thrust into sharply or painfully

slaughter: the act of killing

slob: a slovenly or boorish person

slovenly: untidy especially in personal appearance

lather: a foam or froth formed when a detergent (such as soap) is agitated in water

stick out: project

hotshot: a talented or successful person who often has a showy or flashy manner

flunk out: to be dismissed from a school or college for failure

lousy: miserably poor or inferior

miserable: wretchedly inadequate or meager

meager: lacking desirable qualities

tap dance: a step dance tapped out audibly by means of shoes with hard soles or soles and heels to which taps have been added

The Ziegfeld Follies was a series of elaborate theatrical revue productions on Broadway in New York City from 1907 to 1931, with renewals in 1934 and 1936.

ole: old

horse around: to engage in horseplay

horseplay: rough or boisterous play

boisterous: noisily turbulent

buck: dollar

half nelson: a wrestling hold in which one arm is thrust under the corresponding arm of an opponent and the hand placed on the back of the opponent's neck

wrestling: a sport or contest in which two unarmed individuals struggle hand to hand with each attempting to subdue or unbalance the other

panther: a leopard of the black color phase

vise: any of various tools with two jaws for holding work that close usually by a screw, lever, or cam

gorgeous: splendidly or showily brilliant or magnificent

Doberman pinscher: any of a breed of short-haired medium-sized dogs of German origin

for Chrissake: used as an exclamation of annoyance or exasperation

exclamation: a sharp or sudden utterance

exasperated: having or showing strong feelings of irritation or annoyance

checker: chessboard

dough: money

lock: a tuft, tress, or ringlet of hair

tuft: clump

tress: a long lock of hair

ringlet: a small ring or circle

booze: intoxicating drink

hound: a mean or despicable person

playwright: a person who writes plays

steamy: intensely or uncomfortably hot

crumby: very poor or inferior

nosy: of prying or inquisitive disposition or quality

pry: to look closely or inquisitively

inquisitive: given to examination or investigation

disposition: prevailing tendency, mood, or inclination

muffler: a scarf worn around the neck

rile: to make agitated and angry

conceited: having or showing an excessively high opinion of oneself

barge: to move ponderously or clumsily

ponderous: unwieldy or clumsy because of weight and size

Online Dictionary used: https://www.merriam-webster.com

一字兩義

digital

(adj.) 數碼的

(adj.) 指的

example: digital rectal examination

Mouse

舊時的滑鼠底下有個滾球，不時要折開滑鼠清潔軸心。

trailer

• DJ[ˋtreilə]

Discrimination

2013年護理學系畢業，在醫管局面試，遭到考官歧視。

當日我說︰「本身有 mood disorder，可否安排我在 subacute setting 工作？」

醫管局膠層說︰「通常那些叻仔，才有這些 disorder。」

當年太年輕，我應該用紙和筆寫下那位女士的姓名和職級，然後投訴。

另外一提，幾年前我聽商務大學店其中一位店長(現已離職)稱，醫管局膠層曾用公帑買花露水。

歷史與自由

我們允許自己接受「必然式的政治觀」(politics of inevitability)，認為歷史只會朝單一方向前進，必定逐步走向自由主義的民主制 (liberal democracy)。

第二種反歷史式的回顧過去方式，是「永恆式的政治觀」(politics of eternity)。永恆式政治觀和必然式政治觀，都是掩蓋歷史真實的面具，只是方式不同。雖然它重視過去發生的事，但只熱中於自己的版本，不去看歷史的事實。

永恆式的政治觀，會讓我們沉迷於神話式的往日故事，不再思考未來的可能性。習慣以受害者自居，會削弱我們修正自己錯誤的動力。

如果說必然式的政治觀讓人陷入呆滯，永恆式的政治觀就是讓人陷入催眠︰循環不已的往日神話宛如不停捲動的漩渦，釘住你我的目光，攝走我們的心神 —— 然後我們就會聽從別人的命令，犯下令人震驚的大錯。

如果你曾經相信最終一切都會變好，如今你就會相信最終什麼都不會改善。

如果你曾經認為社會必然會不斷進步，因而沒有付出任何努力，如今你也可以繼續無所作為，因為你相信歷史必然循環。

必然性與永恆性的政治觀，都是反歷史的立場。而唯一能夠阻止我們陷入這兩個極端的力量，正是歷史本身。歷史讓我們辨認規律、讓我們做出判斷。它幫我們勾勒出世界的結構，讓我們在其中追求自由。

歷史賦予我們責任感，讓我們知道自己即使無法決定整體大局的走向，依然會左右每個瞬間的發展。

家長式管治與篤信專家的分野

【商業電台】今天報導

新加坡連續4日單日新增超過3000宗本地新冠病毒病例，昨日新增3590宗。總理李顯龍發表全國電視講話，安撫國民對「與病毒共存」防疫政策的疑慮。

新加坡當局宣布， 本月19日起，進一步擴大「疫苗接種者旅遊通道」國家名單，將允許包括美國、英國、法國、西班牙、意大利、荷蘭、丹麥和加拿大8個歐美國家的已接種疫苗人士，入境新加坡後毋須隔離。

【HK01】八月報導

袁國勇直指「唔好再諗免疫屏障」，外國經驗反映即使接種率超過七成，仍會有大爆發，而香港即使有九成人打針，仍有一成、即75萬人可能受感染，假設死亡率是1%，也會有7500人不治，因此全港市民也應接種新冠疫苗，才可保護自己，並達至通關、放寬社交距離。

到底清零及與病毒共存，兩者更可取？袁國勇認為兩個策略並不矛盾。本港現階段要繼續清零，因為安老院舍接種率低過兩成、80歲人口只有約10%人接種第一針，香港人口又密集，「清零之目標非為撲滅新型冠狀病毒病，而是爭取時間為全民接種疫苗。當外國不能實現清零，香港亦難以長期保持零確診」。要確保開關及放寬防疫規定前，適合打針者完成疫苗接種，屆時即時有疫情都可當傷風的病毒處理，不過未達全民接種時，很難具體討論下一階段的防疫策略。

黑日與半蝕

幾個月之間，我們經歷了慘烈的失去，許多人喪失了性命，成了死因不明的浮屍，有許多人永久傷殘，也有更多人被凌辱和侵犯，像日全蝕時，黑暗掩蔽了大部份的太陽。

韓麗珠《黑日》

二零一九年十一月十九日

恐懼管理

社會心理學名詞，指人類面對死亡威脅時造成的心理行為變化。

人類面臨恐懼時會更加保護自己的世界觀與立場，並且大幅增加支持魅力型領袖的可能性。

國會縱火案是希特勒政府關鍵時刻。主要以民主程序獲得執政權的納粹黨，透過這次事件將國家轉變為永久性的邪惡納粹政體，這便是恐懼管理的典型例子。

《暴政》

團合主義

一種將社會團體納入政治體系，增進社會與政治穩定的體制。例如建立制度化的協商體系，將資方、工會等代表不同利益的團體一同整合進入經濟決策圈，以協商結果作為政策方向。許多威權國家則藉此名義，進一步操控組織。它們會管控民間組織的許可證、由官方指派組織領導人，使所有社會與經濟組織落入政府掌控。

《暴政》

花の唄

Those days were gone

like they were all just a dream

Leaving behind your timid (膽怯的) smile

and gentle nails

Like a boring flower petal

I forgot all my suffering

and smiled, softly crying

on your shoulders

I was filled with wonderful love

Make me think of days

that never come back

Holding my breath

in an artificial garden

I stayed in a moment

much like the quiet bottom of the sea

Forgetting that seasons come and go

Cold flower petals

scatter in the night

They look just like white snow, don't they?

The fell above you

so bittersweet (苦樂參半)

I just want to brush away

all your sadness

I will never be able to forgive anything

that hurts you

I wish I could go back

to those sweet and gentle days

So badly, it makes me tear up

The flower petals

I looked up at with you

have scattered

The moon hid in the cloud

which made you lose your way

You looked at me

like you were ready to burst into tears

If we put together

our two, jagged (鋸齒狀) little hearts

I am sure something gentle

would come to life

You did not allow anything

to hurt me

That's all I could ever ask for

I clutched (抓緊) the hand

you held to me flirtatiously (輕佻)

Finally, a warm gleam lit

The world I have already given up

The cold flower petals

tear up the night

I want to bundle up all the lights I have picked

and sprinkle (灑落) them all over you

like joy

You promised that you would get mad at me

if I ever did anything bad, didn't you?

So I am sure you will find me one more time

You don't need to be somewhere

that makes you feel lonely

The flower petals

I looked up at alone

have scattered